wigwamhome (wigwamhome) wrote in acoa,
wigwamhome
wigwamhome
acoa

feeling like i betrayed the a ?

i had to make the decision of letting other family members know about my a's disease and how it's been pretty bad in recent months. my other family members love get togethers and i'll be visiting from a long distance with a baby and the last thing i want is for my a to show up and make a scene. he's consistently drunk on weekends now.

i never knew i would feel so guilty after letting them know. i've been assured they will keep the knowledge secret but my mind's been going to "what if" thinking .. "what if" they tell my a what they know. they've assured me they know better than to confront him but this whole thing is still weighing heavily on my mind.

anyone ever get into this situation before where they had to warn others about their a... ? 
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By the time I'd shared my dad's "big secret" with other family members, they'd long since guessed the situation. The warning signs are a lot clearer to people looking from the outside in than you might think. A lot of my uncles (and a couple aunts) have also had substance abuse problems in the past (thankfully most have been sober long-term at this point), and are understanding enough to not bring it up or be overly judgemental about it.